Day Six - lie in

A slow start to the day today. Everyone out as usual for 7:30 so I got up for some breakfast. All I could manage was a small bowl of fruit & fibre, which is just enough to have my tablets on. After that I went back to bed till 10 am.
Had some crumpet when I got up after having a shower and shave. Felt human again. Not long after I had a fried egg butty.
Food is still going down well, and apart from actually preparing it, I've not lost my appetite yet.
Took Isaac over to John Lewis to get his new camera. Stopped in SK at the indoor paintball to pay for his rugby teams game this Sunday.
Came home and chilled on the sofa for a while. Isaac took Ellie out.

Made a nice stew for tea.
Paul & Regina came by for a visit. Always nice to have visitors.
And now time for bed. Still feeling tired and a bit lethargic.
I can afford a little down time though. If I counted up all the exercise I've done this year alone, having a week or so off it while my chemo kicks in isn't going to hurt.

Good night xx

Day Five - Fruity

I didn't feel like getting up this morning. Went to bed early last night, before 10pm, then was awake at 12, 3 and then finally 6am. Didn't feel tired as such, just kind of a lack of energy. Anyway, I waited till everyone had left, Joh to work with Paige and Isaac off to College, and got up. Had some crumpets for breakfast with Lurpak and Jam, which again, went down no problem, with no sticking in my gullet.
I then got a nice Tweet off Gary, the former 39 stone cyclist. We'd been in touch before about maybe going for a ride, but he's moved out of the area and we'd lost touch. He'd only just realized that it was me with the cancer, and the same person who'd bought the Cannondale bike off his mate. Small world :)
Pottered around doing some tidying up, then took Ellie out for a little walk. Stopped at Polocini for a coffee and chat with Claire, then came home and had some lunch. Potatoe and Leek soup with 2 slices of bread. Easy down again. Nice. I've not lost my appetite as yet, just the thought of making food is making me a bit queasy.
I was supposed to be at a support group at Stepping Hill this afternoon, but I'd got the date wrong. It was yesterday, so I missed that. Not to worry, I'd dropped off Isaac's camera gear on the way for him, so he could do some filming this afternoon, and took the time to do a bit of Xmas shopping in SK while I was out and feeling ok.
Still feeling a little spaced. Not dizzy, just not 100%.
When I arrived home, my neighbour had taken in a parcel for me. I'd no idea what it was. Upon opening the big box, it was a gorgeous fruit hamper from my fellow managers at Royal Mail. A massive thanks for that Gents and Ladies, much appreciated. The fruit is bloody gorgeous :)

Purchased the latest version of Rouleur and Cyclist magazines while I was out, did a little reading on the sofa, had a doze, little bit more reading, then Isaac came home, followed by Joh.
I fancied a curry tonight, but the Indigo only had tables at 6pm and 9pm, too early and too late for me, so we went down the Hare & Hounds in Otterspool instead.
I was so confident of my latest eating abilities that I ordered a burger and chips. The last time I had burger and chips was at the Mud Crab in Didsbury, and the chips all got stuck in my gullet and it took me over an hour to eat the burger! No such problems this time. The burger went down fine, and I even ate most of the chips. Result! I was still taking my time eating, but it wasn't even remotely as bad as it's been over the last 3 months.

So, in just 5 days, after a 10 hour infusion and 2 lots of tablets everyday, it would seem my gullet has cleared enough for food to pass through with only minor sticking. I've no idea why, but it's got to be a good sign.

Good night xx

Day Four - Beechwood Cancer Care Centre

I've spoken about our family visits to Beechwood in past blog entries, and it's a very good place to go. I went there today to start an 8 week course of relaxation techniques and group help. This is a fantastic place, full of professional nurses and volunteers, all there to help people suffering primarily with cancer to relax and forget about their daily troubles.
The day started a little slow as the cold start had delayed some of the patients arriving, and some just didn't turn up at all. There were supposed to be 12 of us there today, but only 5 turned up. Eventually there were 6 as a lady on an introduction got roped in too :)
The morning was spent filling in some paperwork, and having a one to one with one of the McMillan nurses. We then had a break before sitting down to a lovely lunch. After that, it was onto the demonstrations of the available therapy provided by the centre.
Reiki, aromatherapy and reflexology. I've chosen reflexology for my next 7 sessions, which I'm looking forward to.
To be honest, I was that relaxed by the time we got to the demonstrations, that I kept nodding off, which was nice. That was it for the day, after a little chat from one of the nurses to close the day, we were off.

However, all was not well on the way home.

After a day spent relaxing, the drive home was the complete opposite. Can you guess why?

Of course, I got stuck behind a Volvo driver! Talk about Mr Erratic, he couldn't drive for shit, all over the road, speed from 20 - 40, in a 30, the usual Volvo traits.

And breath.

All in all a good day. On the medicine front, I'm eating a lot better all of a sudden, with none of my previous problems with food sticking in my gullet. I actually had a full portion of oven chips tonight, with peas and a baby's head. That went down no problems. Well chuffed. I feel tired, but not overly so.

Good night all xx

Day three - steady as she goes

Quite a mundane and easy day today. I'll do this one in bullet points I think:

• Woke around 4 am with a hot sweat, not unusual as I've been having them off and on for a few months now. 
• Woke again around 6 am very thirsty, had some water. 
• Joh kindly brought me up some porridge around 8 so I could have my first lot of chemo tablets in good time. I have to have them 12 hours apart and within 30 minutes of food. 
• I'd pencilled in a ride with Jon for today, but I wasn't feeling 100% so cried off that (Thanks Jon :))
• Went to the gym for an hour instead, 30 minutes on the stepper x trainer thing, and 30 minutes on the bike, with some ab work in between. Felt tired after that little workout. 
• Made myself a lovely bacon, cheese and mushroom omelette, made sure the eggs were fully cooked. 
• Tidied up, took Ellie for a walk along the canal and stopped at Polocini coffee shop for a flat white and a gorgeous piece of chocolate fudge cake. 
• Joh met me there for her lunch as she'd been working this morning and done a little Xmas shopping in SK. 
• Paige met us there as well, after finishing work at Hewitts coffee shop, we all bundled into Joh's car for the drive home. Ellie likes going for a drive. 
• Isaac was at Rugby today, and won his match, scoring one of the tries himself. Awesome!

On the subject of Isaac, he posted a picture of me wearing a hat he'd bought for me on Facebook. For those of you that have seen it, you'll see it's had an amazing response from his friends. Isaac, you have some incredible friends around you as I do, together we'll beat this shit.

• Joh and Paige went to the gym, while I waited for Isaac to come home from rugby. When he did, I took him to SK to meet up with some of his skating mates for a film he's working on. Check out his channel on YouTube, he's really getting quite good. 
• I then went to McDonald's and got myself a double cheeseburger and a medium fries. I parked up in Offerton and ate the lot, nice. 
• Back home, and fed the dog and cat, tidied up again, watched a bit of telly till Joh, Paige and Isaac all got in. 
• Had a nice tea of macaroni cheese, sausage, bacon, tomatoes and garlic bread, lovely. 
• Had my last tablets of the day and settled down to watch the remake of "the girl with the dragon tattoo" Wasn't as bad as I thought it might be, although from memory it was almost a carbon copy of the original, which was excellent. 
• By this time, Joh and the kids were all in bed, and I'm down here typing this and watching Homeland. 

At this time, I just feel a little light headed, and a little bloated, possibly from all I've eaten today as I had a mince pie and custard for supper. However, and I hope you're not eating while reading this bit, my bowels are loosening today. That's understandable I guess, and part of the after effects of chemo drugs, so nothing to worry about, just be careful when passing wind :) 

I'm off to the Beechwood Centre tomorrow for a day of sharing and relaxation. Looking forward to that. 

Good night all xx

Day two - tablets

Up until 22:30 tonight, my day was going fine. Still no effects from yesterday's 10 hour marathon infusion, felt fine in myself. So much so that I managed some hoovering (dysoning?) this morning, sorted the washing and went for a little flat bike ride through poynton and around woodford. I had a nice lunch of a pork pie and spaghetti cheese, and then my dad and step mum came to visit for a while.
Joh got home around 17:30 and made a lovely paella. That took me a while to eat but it was worth it. Half an hour later I took my second dose of chemo pills around 20:30.
By 22:30, while watching "we need to talk about Kevin" (good film) my chest started to hurt, like I had acute indigestion. And I also had a small feeling of sickness in my stomach.
This was a bit crap as I had to go get my son and his girlfriend from a party in Bredbury. No problems. Son and Kate duly collected its straight to bed for me with two anti-sickness pills inside me. Time to sleep it off hopefully.
Good night all.

Day one - Chemo infusion

infusion /in·fu·sion/ (in-fu´zhun)

1. the steeping of a substance in water to obtain its soluble principles.

2. the product obtained by this process.

3. the therapeutic introduction of fluid other than blood into a vein.

I've had number 3 of the above definition today, for 10 hours. We arrived at the Christie this morning for 08:50am, for our 9am appointment. Thankfully the drugs had been ordered and we were directed to the waiting room while my chair was prepared for me. 

20 mins later and the chair was good to go, however, the nurse, Hannah, decided that as we were there all day, we'd be better off in a bed, a private bed no less in our own room with a lovely view of the front of the hospital. After yesterdays cock up, that was nice. 

So, cannula in, drugs assembled and the infusion can begin. Only 10 hours to go. 

The first bit is the hardest, as this is the very toxic and strongest form of chemotherapy drug that can be administered in this way, it's introduced by syringe manually as the fluids with anti-sickness drugs are going in. Bit by bit, Hannah pushes the drugs in over the next hour and a half. 

After that, there's another lot of fluids and then another bag of chemo drugs, this time going in the line normally over 4 hours. The manifest for my drugs is here: 

Then another load of fluids, interspersed with a spot of morning snacks, lunch, afternoon snacks and the occasional brew. 

And that was it, at 21:20 all done, cannula out, room tidy, bags packed and on our way back to the car and home. 

So, side effects? Non, nada, nothing, nilch. I feel 100% while I'm writing this at 22:47 on Friday night. To be honest, that's a bit of an anti-climax really. I was expecting to be puking my guts up by now, or feel some sort of nausea, but I guess the anti-sickness drugs I've had today have stopped that in its tracks. 

I've now got 21 days worth of chemo tablets to take at home, along with some anti-sickness and a few steroids to boost my system tomorrow and Sunday. After that, it's back to the Christie to do it all over again. 

Once again, I'd like to thank all of you who have given me messages of support over the last 2 days, and also those of you who've been supporting me throughout. Your words really lifted me out of the doldrums yesterday and gave me the support I needed. 

Thank you xx

Fuck up!

5:45am, we're up. Joh has a quick shower, I wash and dress. Simple breakfast of a couple of crumpets and jam, Joh defrosts the car, kiss the kids and tell them how much we love 'em, and we're off to the Christie.
First infusion of chemotherapy today. This is what I've been waiting for since I was diagnosed. All the stories you hear of the side effects of chemo are about to become a reality for me. I've been mentally preparing myself for the last week and a half for this day. An 8 hour infusion of chemo drugs, steroids, fluids and other drugs, all in one sitting. Joh has taken the day off to be with me. I said she didn't need to bother, she could of  dropped me off and gone to work, but she wants to stay. We roll up nice and early, get to reception with 10 minutes to spare for our 8am blood test. I'm scheduled for my drugs at 9:30, so plenty of time.
Bloods are done at 8:20. We go get a coffee while we wait for the blood to be tested and made sure I'm ok to start treatment today. At 9:50 I get a call to report to reception, then asked to go upstairs to the treatment ward on the 1st floor.
A nurse asks us to come into the ward, saying there's been a problem. My first thought was that my bloods are not right somehow?
No, bloods fine, my Doctor has made a "clerical error", or in other words: forgot to put the order in for my chemo drugs.
Some peoples drugs need to be made up on the day of treatment as they have a limited shelf life. If you make them too soon, they'll "go off" and not be effective. Likewise, if you miss an appointment, you wont be able to come in the next day because the drugs will have to be remade. So to ensure you get these type of drugs on time, they need to be ordered the day before your treatment so they are made early on the day of your treatment. This means they are at their optimal. If they're not ordered, it takes over 4 hours to make the drugs up, and a further 8 hours to inject them, so you can imagine how long it would've taken today if they'd ordered the drugs at 10 am.
The nurse is very apologetic. She offers me the chance to go see the Doctor in his surgery. I don't see the point in waiting around any longer just to hear his excuses on why he's not done his job properly. I'm livid, pissed off and just want to leave. On the way out I punch the wall in frustration.
After all the preparation for today, I've been severely let down by the system.

We have a quiet drive back home.

I contemplate a bike ride, have the soup that we'd prepared for the day at the Christie, then have a doze on the sofa while Joh goes out.
It's now raining. I'm not going out riding.
Roll on tomorrow where we'll do it all again, Joh misses her friends wedding because she'll be with me all day, and I can finally start to beat this fucking cancer.