Do you know that feeling you get when something makes you feel like gagging? Perhaps you're a little squeamish and something on the telly has made you gag, or you're out and about and you see something that makes you a little sick in your mouth. Well, that's how I feel all the time at the moment.
As the chemo drugs once again start to fill me up, my bodies reaction is to try to get rid by making me gag. The only problem is, there's no sick, just the motion of being sick. The slightest thing can set this off. Thinking about doing something like eating a piece of toast can make me gag, tablet taking makes me gag and so on. The relief from this all consuming sensation is in the drugs. Once administered they provide some normality from the gagging but then bring along sleepiness and lethargy with them. So perky and sick, or tired and not so sick. Top choices.
Such is the effect of chemotherapy. Far worse than any operation and so much harder to overcome. The pains from my operation are getting less everyday. I've got loads of sensation back in my shoulder and my stomach is feeling less swollen now.
This is a struggle, I'll be honest. I really wasn't looking forward to this final piece of the treatment, knowing how I felt the first time round makes it even worse. If I could stop now I would, but the doctor said that even though all the cancer has been cut out, this final dose of chemo is proven to be very beneficial.
So, onward and upward (or downward more like).
That's me for the next few weeks now, according to my calculations I should be finally off the chemo by the 9th July.